Starting college and meeting new people is one of the most exciting things we’ll do in life.
The reason for that is nearly every aspect of our lives change almost overnight when we begin college. There are new people, new friends, new places, and new things everywhere.
It all happens so fast that we tend to lose track of everything that came before, even the old friendships which we don’t want to leave behind. Thus begins the dilemma of making new friendships while managing old ones in college.
Old friendships are awesome. When we start college there’s a good chance we have active friendships that go all the way back to early childhood.
These friendships have been a part of our everyday lives for so long that we hardly recognize ourselves outside of them. That’s why it is natural to not want these friendships altered.
Basically, just because we start college and everything in our lives are changing; doesn’t mean we want our old friendships to change too.
However, the reality is that we do not have a choice. Now that we’re in college we need to move forward with our lives and our old friendships need to move forward with us.
That’s the hard truth when learning how to manage old friends in college.
Once we graduate from high school, a lot of the old friendships we’ve had for a long time will begin to drift away.
Of course we’ll hold onto the really close old friendships, but the ones which drift away leave an opening for new friendships to begin in college.
The paradox of this situation is that most students want to bring as many old friendships with them into college as possible.
The problem with that is the more friendships we drag with us from high school to college will directly subtract from the new friendships we’ll be able to make.
After all, there’s only so many friendships we can keep up at once. That means if we want to make awesome new friendships at college, we’ll have to let some old high school friendships go for now.
Once we decide which old high school friendships we’re going to actively keep up we need to find a way to introduce them to our new college friends as quickly as possible.
That’s the best way to go because we’ll be keeping up all of our friendships, both old and new, at once. Of course, this may not be practical in certain situations.
However, with social media and low cost travel we have the opportunity to gather our old and new friends together somewhat effectively.
Also, some students who attend college close to home attempt to hang-out with their new college friends by day, and then get together with their old high school friends by night.
This isn’t good because it’s done out of the fear of moving forward in life which prevents us from truly getting integrated into the college mainstream.
That’s why it’s always a bad idea to go to college all day and then run back to our home towns at night to hang out. Doing so blocks us from fully experiencing college and making a bunch of new friends.
College has massive potential for make new friends and having awesome experiences.
However, we need to actively seek out those new friends and awesome experiences which we can’t do if we’re running back to our hometowns every night.
Yes, it’s true that some of our home town high school friends may get upset or turn against us when we hang-out at college making new friends.
What must be done at that point is to talk with our old friends and show them that making new friends at college is good for everyone.
Then, everyone can hang out together and move forward. Unless of course certain old friends don’t want to move forward; which causes problems.
A lot of people feel threatened by change. Especially when they see an old friend making new friends. They don’t like it. They just want everything to remain the way it’s always been.
When that happens, it’s time to take a break from that old friend. We must not let them hold us back from fully experiencing college and all the new friendships which await us just because they can’t handle change.
The break from the old friend doesn’t need to last forever. However, time apart will allow them to hopefully understand that real friendships always encourage the addition of new friends. That’s how everyone wins.
That’s ultimately how to manage old friends in college while tapping into our inborn power. This will bring us closer to living as the most complete version of ourselves immediately.
* Action Step *
Question: The road splits in two up ahead. One road will take you to places you have never been, and the other one will lead you back home to where all your friends are. Which one do you take?
Answer: Take the road back home. Fill the car with as many old friends as possible and find the road to new tomorrows with all the yesterdays that want to come along.
List three old friends from high school you would like to keep up a close friendship with:
Next, list three new friends from college you would like to integrate with your old friends from high school:
Now, list three possibilities in which you can take one or all of your friends from the first list and get them in the same place as one or all of your friends from the second list.
Finally, make it happen. Get as many friends as possible in the same place at the same time.
How To Manage Old Friends In College Now
– Written by Motivational Joe